Yoga Practice After Hysterectomy Surgery

It’s been about 7 months since my hysterectomy surgery and I’m slowly returning to my Ashtanga practice.  Practice has been a bit unscheduled, and by that I mean I’m not able to do physical asana every day yet.  On the days that I don’t do asana, I use the time slot in its entirety for my Lenten meditation with Mona Lisa.   My practice partner slid easily into our old morning practice routine and particularly enjoys the off-days because of the extended lap time.  

Back in January, I started with a sun salutations A and B, closed with the 3 lotus flowers and savasana.  By mid to late January, I added in the standing postures and headstand every few days.  Since I no longer have “ladies holidays”, I have peppered in my rest days in between moon days and Saturdays based on how my still healing body feels.  Speaking of which; I’d heard that Sunday was now a rest day, so I tried practicing on Saturdays for about 2 weeks before I settled back into the Sunday practice rhythm.  Old habits...

As far as led classes go, I take led primary classes on Thursdays and Sundays, which are so enjoyable after so much time off.   I really missed seeing everyone, the cozy warmth of the studio and the familiar sound of bare feet on hardwood.   I’m still on teaching hiatus except for the occasional sub opportunity, so that means there’s play time!  Oh how sweet it is to pop in on a week night or a Saturday morning vinyasa class for a little free stylin’. 

Fast forward to a few weeks ago, I attended my first full led primary class..  Physically, it was a command performance.  Making all jump backs and managing the arm balances somewhat gracefully.  However, about 2 hours later I found myself on the couch curled up with China Gel and Advil with my teacher Keith's voice in my head saying "skip some jumpbacks".   I slept in on Monday.

What have I noticed about my physical self since returning to yoga since surgery?

1. I have I have more room in my belly!  Folds and twists that hit a wall before have greater range of movement.   The growing solid bulk of the fibroids were really been doing a number on me.
2. I’m light.  My hips don’t feel nearly as heavy and I’ve managed to float once or twice.
3. Upper body strength seems in tact  but it’s my legs that get wobbly and my calves that burn.  I notice this mostly in vinyasa classes.  Also, my upper abs felt sore a lot initially but this has begun to subside.
4. My focus is much more intense.  I’ve never had much trouble with dristi, but it seems even more focused now.

What have I noticed mentally since surgery?

1. I'm in absolutely NO RUSH to regain my previous practice momentum and ability.   My hysterectomy feels like a right of passage along with age (smile) to this state of mind.  I do my best to stay on schedule, but sometimes I don't and I'm OK with that.
2. I frequently say hello to my new body during practice.  I'm still healing and have a long way to go; but at 7 months post op I've been amazed and surprised at what happens on the mat.
3. A weight of worry has been lifted.  Gone are the embarrassing ladies holidays that crept up on me and sidelined practice at a moments notice and created a constant, anxious state of mind.

This weekend, I'm attending a mysore session with Krista Shirley’s in DC.  This will be my first mysore studio session in about 10 months, so I'm looking forward. 

I've been taking some photos and videos of my practice to document post surgery progress mostly, and this photo was taken on St. Patty’s Day.  Found the socks when I was out shoe shopping.  I didn’t’ find any shoes, but the socks were a must have J. 

Uterine Fibroids and Hysterectomy

I've been living with ovarian cysts and uterine fibroids for most of my life.  It started with a little pang in my right side that turned out to be an ovarian cyst back in high school.  Medication dissolved it, but ovulation from that side remained painful throughout the years.  For the most part, I didn't have any issues during my 20's except for the heavy periods that I thought were normal.  

By the time I got married in my 30's and wanted to have kids, my fibroids made their presence known in the form of even heavier and painful periods and increased comments from my OBGYN.  "You're going to have to hurry up and get pregnant," he told me.  "your fibroids are getting larger and you're not getting any younger.  Time to decide what to do with the baby shop."   Until that conversation, my position on motherhood remained at the intersection of, 'I don't want kids yet' and 'it's probably time to settle down'" and so I decided after that visit to try and get pregnant.  However, it wasn't in the cards for my then husband and me, and while we tried to figure out our lives the clock kept on ticking.

Fast forward to me approaching 40.  My fibroids had grown so large that pregnancy wasn't possible so I opted for a myomectomy to buy time.  After surgery, my doctor warned that fibroids were like weeds and that even though he was able to remove all the tumors, the uterus acts as a root and can sprout new growths.  Full recovery took a year, and in that time my marriage ended.   After relocating, I slowly began life again and unbeknownst to me for a while, the fibroids began to grow back.

Now in my early 40's, fertility was becoming an issue and it was at that time that I began to let go the hope of being able to  have children of my own naturally.   The menorrhagia returned, sometimes twice a month and I was instructed to double up on iron supplements.  Then one day, I felt what seemed like a little rock in my belly and it actually rolled around sometimes!   During my ashtanga practice paschimottanasana and marichyasana c/d were difficult because of the bulk and associated bloating.  I take 'ladies holidays' off and they seemed to never end.  Practice dwindled and the symptoms would quickly get worse.  Exhaustion from anemia set in and it was all I could do to get home and in bed most evenings after work.  Waking at 5:30 am became impossible.

The last straw was the hard bulge in my belly that became visibly noticeable and the increasing questioning glances I got when I wore form fitting clothes.   My doctor confirmed that the fibroids had doubled in size in 6 months, resulting in what looked like a 16 week pregnancy.  My bladder, bowel and spine were being compressed which brought on a whole slew of new symptoms not to  mention that I could no longer fit into most skirts and pants comfortably.  An MRI would confirm that one of the fibroids had outgrown its blood supply and developed a large cyst.  My treatment options quickly boiled down to Uterine Fibroid Embolization (UFE) and Supracervical Hysterectomy.

While in the process of making a decision, I scoured the internet for information through sites like Hystersisters, YouTube and yoga blogs.   The many posts I read helped me to understand what to expect and enlightened me to a health issue that ranks as one of the most common for women as my surgeon would confirm.  I would personally speak to 7 women in a two week period (4 of them close family members) who'd undergone hysterectomy surgery.

I chose the hysterectomy after seriously considering UFE, which would have allowed me to keep my uterus and offer some relief, but might have landed me back in the same predicament in a few years.  Menopause is still a ways off, and after 10 years of dealing with fibroids I had my quality of life to consider.  I'd gone from being very active to almost sedentary in recent months save for teaching and the few yoga practices I could manage. My boyfriend who'd been very supportive while I weighed my options confessed, "I just want you to be healthy."

My hysterectomy surgery was on August 29 and at 3 weeks post op, I'm feeling like a new creature.  Aside from the need to nap throughout the day, I no longer feel like life is being sucked out of me.   Still in bed mostly, I'm able to get around without much of a production.   Mona Lisa has been my ever constant nursing companion, supervising my boyfriend while he took care of me the first two weeks and handled household tasks on my behalf.    My doctor says I can return to moderate exercise in a few months. 

I'm writing this blog to share my story and offer support to women who are dealing with uterine fibroids.  It's common to take years to decide what to do about them for many reasons, which is understandable.  For me, I feel that even though I could have made this decision on a physical level many years ago, the emotional realizations took far longer to reconcile and I'm glad I waited in that regard.  Once I made the decision to schedule my surgery, I never once looked back.

There are a few quality of life decisions of note that I have suffered through before making.  There are many more, but these stand out:

having lasik surgery
getting a smart phone (yes, I'm serious about this one)
having a hysterectomy

The figurine pictured was a gift from long ago that has come to symbolize peace with regard to this point in my life.  At one time I thought of throwing it in the trash.  Now I'm so glad I didn't.