Love at First Primary

A week ago I decided to teach my Saturday morning class ashtanga at the gym. It would be my first time teaching students ashtanga for the first time, if that makes sense. I'd been sharing with them for several months now and dropping in ashtanga postures while making mention of the origins of vinyasa. There was just one practitioner in the room who'd done primary before, and the rest were totally game and eager to start. I gave a brief explanation of "front to back" and then called the room to order.

The students stood up, closed their eyes, and began victorious breath. Sun salutations progressed, and breathing became more pronounced. After the third sun b, I noticed a shift toward a deeper meditation than usual at this interval. My radar went up and I could only stand in awe of their moment before calling the first standing posture. I was witnessing ashtanga at work.

At the end of standing series, the chaturunga junkies were ready for their treat. But around about janu shirshasana, I began to get the stink eye from them. For new ashtanga practitioners, like clockwork in my classes janu is about that point where the tape starts rolling so loudly in their heads that I can hear it saying, "are you freaking kidding me she wants us to jump back EVERY time?" The takeitupasana option between sides was a welcome suggestion for about two postures but we still had 20 minutes to go. 20 minutes is a long time in your first ashtanga class. "You're doing just fine, just keep breathing" was my encouragement. There were more stink eyes, and this time from just about everyone in the room. I was holding out for the close of practice though, thinking the all too familiar phrase that my parents, your parents, everyone's parents have used insisting, "this is harder for me than it is for you". I knew that it would be all good by 10:05 AM.

Class is only an hour, so we made it up to the arm balances before moving on to wheel and the closing sequence. In gratitude, the students lay prostrate after the last vinyasa and not a creature was stirring. We had to hustle out to make room for 10:15 YIN, but not before many students shared what they thought about their first ashtanga practice. That it was definitely harder, but in a good way. The connection to breath made more sense. The feeling of peace was more compelling after having been completely spent. And yes, I did notice some people leaving the room whom I guessed might not be back...

My first teacher and mentor Ursula likes to say that ashtanga is kind of like that guy or that girl who you just aren't sure how you feel about. Sometimes they make you feel on top of the world and at other times they just break you down. However, there's something about them that keeps you coming back. I can relate to that analogy, and from the nods I always see around me others can too.

So this week I taught ashtanga again for an expectant class and no one was missing! Poised to reciprocate the learning, I was excited too, and from that moment I knew that I was in love.